Captain’s Log—I mean Colonel’s Blog
First officer Spock reporting.
It has been 18 days since the departure of the visiting dignitary Colonel Mustard. The Colonel seemed to be here on some sort of fact finding mission, with protocol and efficiency parametric undertones.
When The Colonel arrived my distrust alarm was activated and I immediately initiated surveillance and undercover work gathering intel to determine whether this was merely a routine inspection or if Colonel Mustard and Lady Penelope Sinclair are part of some sleeper cell or part of the Tail-iban.
|in stealth mode....tailing the suspects|
After three weeks of observation I concluded that the little brown dullard Penny is simply too stupid to be involved in intelligence and judging by the Colonel’s obsession with routine and protocol and butt sniffing it is apparent that she is what she seems to be: an anal retentive inspector.
|no intelligence detected|
Since the Colonel’s disappearance some weeks ago my fellow crewmen Penny is convinced that Mustard has been abducted by an alien race known only as the Newtownians.
|suspected appearance of Newtonians|
Judging by her hangdog face she clearly feels a responsibility for the disappearance as the abduction occurred on her watch.
I have seen her desperately trying to work the controls on my aerial craft, the Cats R Gr8. She is bound and determined to learn the fate of the Colonel.
Having confirmed these two are what they appear to be, a simpleton and a military cog, I have decided to instruct the dull, brown plebe in the fine art of the operation of the single engine craft , Cats R Gr8, that Batu lent me for my surveillance.
Anything is better than watching a hot dog yearning for Mustard. It is easy enough to fly that even a dog can learn.